Life puts you in strange situations sometimes. These are times when nothing is going for you.
There are obstacles in everything that you are doing. Your friends suddenly disappear. They either have their own issues or you simply do not figure in their scheme of things anymore. On a personal note, I do not have anyone who can listen to me, be there for me or even share their problems with me. At least that makes you feel better since you realise that you are not the only one with problems. Yes I feel lonely and uncared for.
Health never was a great ally for the last many years, but now it has donned an adversarial role. The situation is such that not much can be done about it but simply face it. No one knows what tomorrow has in store for them, but when today is so bad and there is not much that you can do about it then tomorrow is even more scary.
I might be sounding despondent, yes maybe I am. I have fought hard till now, never let my illness hamper my spirit, never let it hamper my professionalism. But now I feel that maybe I am fighting a lost cause.
But maybe its not the end of a story, it could be the start of a new story. One of hope, gumption and one of stretching my sinew till it is completely drained to its last drop.
Time will tell.........